Freak factor.

I promise not to blog constantly about X Factor, so don't get all grumpy at the fact I've done it again this week.

However between fitness training and dying on the sofa afterwards I am leading a fairly boring existence.

Now I know I bang on a fair bit about X Factor, but anyone with a Wife/Husband/Partner that is addicted to it like Kelly is, will sympathise with me.

Tonight I was sat there with a bag of sunflower seeds and a glass of water (my life is just that rock 'n' roll) being spoon fed this mass produced shite that has become a national institution. For me the saddest thing is that so many people continue to phone in and vote further lining the pockets of some of the richest people in entertainment for a product that could be bettered by most holiday camp singers.

Last week we saw the end of Jonjo Kerr (Really? Jon joker???) and a duet called 2 shoes..... 2 fucking shoes? I know all the good band names are gone now but even calling yourself pig cock would have more 'cred' than the shite they named themselves. How Jonjo got voted off instead of this guy I am about to beast the shit out of is totally beyond me.

Right, the first thing to piss me off was Craig Colton..... I know I'm hardly a multi platinum selling artist or a famous record producer BUT I know a good singer when I hear someone. He was uninspiring, irritating and for some reason I just had the urge to punch him on all 7 of his chins. I've belted out better performances whilst crawling through the gutters of Cambridge with a traffic cone on my head after drinking 9 pints of lager and a dozen vodka's!

Next up we have Frankie Cocozza.... He's so cool, he has tattoo's on his arse cheeks of various girls names! Wow mate you're fucking amazing, you inspire me..... to scoop my own fucking eyeballs out of my skull with a mouldy fucking teaspoon. Oh and get a fucking haircut, it looks like a family of Lurchers took up residence on your noggin and were promptly beaten to death with a bat.

OK now to Johnny Robinson, Or as I like to call him the bulimic skaghead. He honestly looks like he's been dug up from a grave and given fucking CPR. I don't really know how people like this are allowed on television, he's not edgy, he's not talented...... just fuck off will you. There's something almost creepy about him, I don't know if it's his mannerisms, his personality or just the fact he is fucking creepy, but there's something about him that makes me throw up in my own mouth a little.

As I am typing this some fucking troll faced tramp called Kitty is berating people who booed her last week, well darling, before you get on your high horse, oh too late you already have... you think they are out of order for booing you?

You're arrogant and you're going to fail, I just hope to god it's sooner rather than later so you can crawl back under the rock you crawled out from.

I have decided to actually apply for next years X factor, I am going to be arrogant, rude and miserable. It works for the arse rags on this years show so why not for me?