So last night I was contemplating what to cook for dinner, I had the choice of curry, chicken in barbecue sauce or some form of chicken and bacon pasta dish. As I slammed shut the oven door and waited for the sweet smell of barbecue sauce waft through to the living room I decided to sit down at the computer to have a read of the news. I need to ask a question at this point, the Chicken had what I thought was cheese on top of the sauce, however after 45 minutes at 200 degrees C it still had not melted..... is this normal? If this cheese is really that heat resistant I think we should look into making the next space shuttle out of processed cheese, firemen should be forced to wear cheese suits and oven gloves could also be woven from this revelation of a product.
I was straight away intrigued by a story about Shergar and the fact that he was stolen by the IRA and held for a 2 million pound ransom. The mystery of Shergar's disappearance goes back 30 years and no one ever really knew the truth as to what fate befell that majestic stallion.
However the tr-hoof (see what I did there.... I made a funny!) has been right in front of us for years, but up until just a few weeks ago it was hidden in plain sight.
So Dixon of Dock Green, Poirot, Sherlock Holmes and all you other wannabes can pack up your junk and get out of town. I'm the new crime fighting, puzzle solving sheriff in town! A leaked document today has admitted that Lasagne could have been made with almost 100% horse meat since the summer! But what's to say it was just since the summer? We haven't tested meat products thoroughly for YEARS in the UK, so what's to say we haven't been eating horse, cat, dog or even Chimpanzee for whole lives? It's quite a sobering thought really, we put faith in these food companies to deliver what they say on the packaging, and we spare little thought for those 30 different chemical names we can't even pronounce. We feed things like this to ourselves, friends and even our kids......
It also got me thinking as to whether it bothered me that I may have eaten horse meat advertised as beef, I laughed, shrugged my shoulders, and came to the conclusion that OF COURSE IT DIDN'T BOTHER ME! I'm not a selective carnivore, I'd eat cat, dog, hamster, anything that once had a pulse would most likely go down the hatch with little time for contemplation as to how cute and cuddly it used to be. I'm not against eating most meats, I'd probably draw the line at human flesh, unless I was starving then I'd just be forced to use extra seasoning to make you taste like chicken, and I'd wash you down with a nice bottle of Chianti.
You hear about these stories all the time where some Saga holiday coach takes a wrong turn in the maze of backstreets in Weston-super-mare, and after a few days the old biddies start to eye up the driver as a podgy ration pack. The need for self preservation overrides the thoughts of morality when it comes to eating flesh.
Are there any parents out there who are vegan/vegetarian? I am 99.9% sure that if it came down to skinning Ethel from number 43's cat and feeding it to the kids, or watching them starve to death it'd be a no brainer.....
Children before we eat I'd like to say grace, "Dear lord, thank you for this tasty errrrr chicken we are about to consume. We trust that you will keep a watchful eye over Ethel as she frantically searches for Mr Pickles the cat". Now tuck in kids this Ca..... CHICKEN, I MEANT CHICKEN goes tough when it gets cold.
It also got me thinking back to an old entry in this very blog and the type of animal products that could easily be made for human consumption. Here are a couple I made earlier... (I've always wanted to say that!) I also think that Lion bars should contain real Lions and Panda pops should be made of fermented panda. This year I am going to diversify my meat intake, I plan on trying Crocodile, Kangaroo, Rattlesnake and Bison. So if you come round for a barbecue in the summer and I tell you that unusual meat looks like chicken...........
P>S Quick last minute though..... What the hell is Naan bread made of :O
It also got me thinking as to whether it bothered me that I may have eaten horse meat advertised as beef, I laughed, shrugged my shoulders, and came to the conclusion that OF COURSE IT DIDN'T BOTHER ME! I'm not a selective carnivore, I'd eat cat, dog, hamster, anything that once had a pulse would most likely go down the hatch with little time for contemplation as to how cute and cuddly it used to be. I'm not against eating most meats, I'd probably draw the line at human flesh, unless I was starving then I'd just be forced to use extra seasoning to make you taste like chicken, and I'd wash you down with a nice bottle of Chianti.
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