Monday, 11 January 2016

False grief

Now, this is going to be a controversial one but read it to the end before forming your opinion. I don't ask much of people so just humour me, then assassinate me if needs be....



Why is it that as soon as a celebrity dies everybody is enveloped by a tsunami of grief? Why is it that words such as 'shocked' 'crushed' 'lost' and 'legend' are bandied about like fucking sweets at a kids party? I am sick to death of a million people writing how said celebrity dying has 'ruined their day' of course it fucking hasn't.


What would ruin your day is cutting a finger off in a freak lawnmower accident, stepping on a landmine in a foreign country while fighting for oil in the name of our government. Shit like THAT will ruin your day.

Some man/woman who you barely gave a thought to for years dies and all of a sudden people have jumped on the sympathy train headed for pitymeville on the outskirts of sadland. I mean is it really hurting you THAT much? Nope, it isn't, in fact I am going to tell you right now that you don't actually feel even the slightest bit 'crushed' about that persons death, how can you when you are completely disconnected from them?

I treat every loss of life as sad, weirdly, even the death of SOME people on death row could be seen as a tragedy when you consider that they may have not been guilty, or may even in their guilt have had a way to bring something useful to the world in educating others in the error of their ways.

Indeed the same is true when people die of cancer, I know a lot of people who have had the disease, my mum and dad included. A single loss of life to that bastard disease is a tragedy, but unfortunately it happens, in fact I would imagine that looking at family history I will probably have some form of cancer in my lifetime too, something I fucking dread.

Let me take a couple of examples of times I have shaken my head at what I have read.

David Bowie: A musical genius? For some people maybe, I personally didn't like his music at all. Was it sad that he died? Yes, it is a loss of a life at an age that is considered young nowadays. He died from cancer, another very horrible thing that we should hopefully eradicate in the coming years.

But for people to say that they are devastated, crushed, shocked and mourning the loss, I ask you this. Did YOU think of this person on a daily basis? Nope, probably not since the last time you heard his music, which may have been many years ago.Did you know his family? If you did then you can feel their sadness, you can mourn with them, but the likelihood is that you didn't. You can't feel the pain of a persons death if you:

A) Didn't know them
B) Didn't think about them regularly
C) Only knew them because they were famous

I mean come on, really examine your feelings, do you actually feel sad? Or is it the more likely scenario of having to show how distraught you are on Facebook so you fit in with the social media wankfest over somebody you never even knew?

Are you crushed at the thought of that Syrian man who just got bombed? Even if you saw it in the news you might be horrified, but you don't actually give a shit do you? You'll go back to peeling potatoes, watching the film that the new bulletin interrupted or fall back to sleep.

Amy Winehouse: A 'legend' according to most people who decided to break out the crocodile tears. She was that much of a legend you didn't even help her to get a number 1 hit in the UK! A woman that took heroin and drank to excess on a daily basis, and you're calling her a fucking legend!?!?!

If she was that much of a great person why aren't you encouraging your children to go down the same path as her? A couple of top 10 hits (the biggest being somebody else's song!) and she is talked about as if she is the second coming of Christ.

She died of alcohol poisoning in a flat in London, hardly the death of a legend is it? Yet people were out in force back then pretending to cry into the communal digital handkerchief that the social media passes around so freely.

Nan Pat: I didn't even know who she was, but somebody asked me if I was sad that she'd died? How the fuck can I be? She was nobody to me.... I can have empathy for her family who she left behind, but without sounding truly callous she didn't have anything to do with my life whatsoever.


Grief and sorrow are reserved for situations where they are needed. The passing of a family member or friend, I fully understand that. But for people to get upset over somebody they have no real connection to is fucking stupid. Sorry but that's the truth.


I put it to you that although you might have liked said celebrity, you might be surprised that they have died, you aren't actually sad or broken at all. In fact once you've read this, told me I'm an insensitive arsehole and possibly blocked me on Facebook you'll go back to doing whatever it was you were doing previously and not be sad at all.


So off you go, back to the kitchen, your job or talking to the postman, the grief for celebrity strangers is as fake as the bags sold on the streets of Barcelona. Get over it.




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